Need a laugh, watch Ray Comfort, Mark Spence, Todd Friel and me DANCE...

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Gospel Message on Toothpicks. What?!

"Thank you for calling Living Waters. This is Trisha, how can I help you?"
"Ah yes, I'd like to submit a tract idea." The deep voice on the other end responded.
"Sure, go right ahead, sir." I answered.
"I'd like to see a Gospel message on toothpicks."
"Hmmm." I mumbled.
The caller continued, "That way people can get the Gospel message when they leave the restaurant".
"Hmmm...that's interesting, sir." I responded and added, "How are you going to get the message on the toothpicks?" I inquired.
He answered, "With my TEETH!"
Then the voice broke out into laughter and right away I knew who it was.
"E.Z!!!! I can't believe you!!!" I yelled. "You got me!!!...You got me!!"

(E.Z. is the Vice President of Living Waters. I love working for people that can have this much fun at work. I can remember one caller that sounded like it was E.Z. and I almost said "Come on E.Z....I know it's you!" I'm glad I never did because it was a legitimate customer).

"A joyful heart is good medicine, But a broken spirit dries up the bones." Prov 17:22

What Science Can Do To Stop The Aging Process...

Here's the inside of the book...

Here's what the back reads:

George Burns once said, "By the time you're eighty years old you've learned everything. You only have to remember it." How true. The memory fades as time passes. But this generation is fighting the aging process like no other. While we may be able to slow down the aging process with hair transplants, tucks and cuts, by eating right and exercising, we can't stop it. What would you do to preserve your youth? What would you do then to preserve your most precious possession — your life? Would you be prepared to humble yourself and look to the One who gave it to you in the first place? To do so, simply ask yourself if you think that you are good enough to go to Heaven. Here's how to know: Have you ever lied (even once) or stolen (regardless of value)? Have you ever used God's name in vain, or had sexual thoughts about someone to whom you are not married? Have you ever hated someone? The shocking truth is that if you said yes to those questions, on Judgment Day God will see you as a lying thief, a blasphemer, an adulterer, and even a murderer. Jesus said, "Whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart," and Scripture also says that if you hate someone, you are a murderer. This is the Bible's warning—if God gives you justice on Judgment Day, you will end up in Hell. Forever. But God is rich in mercy, and He made a way for you to be forgiven: "God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Jesus suffered and died on the cross, taking the punishment for your sins. Then He rose from the dead and defeated death. If you repent and trust in Jesus, God will forgive you and grant you eternal life. Pray something like: "Dear God, please forgive my sins (name them). I turn from them and trust Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. In His name I pray. Amen." Then read the Bible daily and obey what you read (see John 14:21). Now go to www.livingwaters.com and click on "Save Yourself Some Pain."

I laughed so hard the first time I saw this. I have a copy at home and I use it on my guests that come over. Then I leave it out for them to read the back. If you'd like a copy to give out to family and/or friends you can find it here: What Science Can Do To Stop The Aging Process

A funny question...

Hat tip: Richard Gunther

Funny Church Sign...

Hat tip to: Rob A.

A merry heart doeth good like a medicine...

Hat tip to J.R. Hall and Berean Watchmen Ministries

for making this. I needed a good laugh. :-)

New and Improved Gospel Tract Bike

I wonder how many gospel tracts I could fit in that basket.

Warning: Don't try this at home... :-)

hat tip: thereifixedit.com

'Good Without God' Ad Campaign

An ad campaign has begun in New York City's subway system to promote a coalition of groups that advocate secularism and atheism - it will run for a month. My question to these folks... "What is good?"

Todd Friel has grown since the last time I saw him...

Having a great time at Deeper 2009.

He's at least a few feet taller. :-)

I FINALLY found a handbag to fit all my gospel tracts...

Cute, laughable, absurd...

What Evolutionists would have you believe...

Monkdog (poor thing looks cold)

Pitcow
Squaguar

Birdog

Chimpanther
squirpup

Evidence for Atheism

I watched The Privideged Planet tonight and was inspired to post this...

Look at all the evidence on the inside...

This can be used like a tract.

I've handed these to atheists and they tend to get a laugh out of it.

Then there's a gospel message on the back.

This is what is reads:
"It was G.K. Chesterton who rightly stated, "If there were no God, there would be no atheists." A thinking person will tell you that it's impossible to prove that God doesn't exist. Before someone can say, "There is no God," he or she needs to have all knowledge — because somewhere in the universe there may be evidence that God does exist. And there is, right under our noses. A building is proof there was a builder. A painting is proof there was a painter, and creation is absolute proof that there was and is a Creator. The question is, are you good enough to go to Heaven? Here's how to know: Have you ever lied (even once) or stolen (regardless of value)? Have you ever used God's name in vain, or had sexual thoughts about someone to whom you are not married? Have you ever hated someone? If you said yes to those questions, on Judgment Day God will see you as a lying thief, a blasphemer, an adulterer, and even a murderer. Jesus said, "Whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart," and Scripture also says that if you hate someone, you are a murderer. This is the Bible's warning — if God gives you justice on Judgment Day, you will end up in Hell. Forever. Not believing in something won't make it go away. You need to be forgiven before that day, and because God is rich in mercy He made a way for you to be clean in His sight: "God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Jesus suffered and died on the cross, taking the punishment for your sins. He paid your fine in His life's blood, so that you could leave the courtroom. Then He rose from the dead and defeated death. Your death sentence can be commuted. Please, come to your senses— repent and trust in Jesus, and God will forgive you and grant you eternal life. Pray something like: "Dear God, please forgive my sins (name them). I turn from them and trust Jesus Christ as my Lord and Saviour. In His name I pray. Amen." Then read the Bible daily and obey what you read (see John 14:21)." Visit LivingWaters.com

For all the dog lovers out there

Bury me with my cell phone?

According to MSNBC, a new fad has arisen in the UK and Australia, that is now becoming popular in America: Burying the Dead with Their Cell Phones…

Apparently, many people are either requesting to have their cell phones buried with them, or, the relatives/friends of the deceased are burying them with their cell phones on a full battery. After the battery wears out, the relatives or friends call and leave messages in an attempt to feel connected to their loved one. Apparently, being buried with your iPod is an upcoming fad taking shape as well.

Two things are apparent: 1) People love their identity and personal existence so much that they desire to get phone calls they can never be aware of, and 2) People want to hold on to the loves of this world, that they’ll leave voice mails that can never be heard in an attempt to deceive themselves that they are still connected with those who are no longer alive.

Self deception is a reality that exposes the lengths that mankind will go to feel comfortable within the false reality that they feel comfortable in. Three things are for sure, 1) You can't take your cell phone with you when you die, and 2) No one will be able to call you from earth when you're dead, and 3) 10 out of every 10 people will die. It's appointed once for man to die and then the judgment (Heb 9:27).

Make sure that when you face God on judgment day that you have Christ's righteousness and not your own (Romans 3:21-27). If you haven't repented of your sins and trusted in Christ, please do so today.

I'm reminded of the first stanza of the great hymn written by Edward Mote in 1797-1874:

"My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus' blood and righteousness; I dare not trust the sweetest frame, But wholly lean on Jesus' name. On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand; All other ground is sinking sand. "

Don't try this at home...

I made pizza the other night and I was excited to use my

new pizza cutter. I'd guess you would call me a penny pincher...

I really don't like spending money...

unless I have to--so I broke down and bought a new pizza cutter. I was surprised when I had a hard time slicing it.

I probably tried cutting the pizza five different times and ways...

then I noticed that it felt awfully thick...

That's when it dawned on me that I had left the

cardboard underneath...I cooked it that way too. :-)

I must have been pretty hungry to throw the pizza

in the oven with the cardboard under it. Maybe I should

just stick to witnessing. :-)

The Fast Food Church Just for You--afterall...YOU deserve the BEST...

No thank you...I think I'll stick with Sovereign Joy. :-)

What do you do for Christmas Cards?

This was our 2005 family Christmas photo when we lived in California...

and yes...we sent it out with Baby's tongue like that. HaHa!
2006 Christmas Photo in California (we wrapped Baby up in decor for that shot)...

This is a photo of the front portion of our Christmas Card 2007
(our first year in Texas)...we took the photo at
a friends house...Baby got left out of this one.

Here's what I typically do for my cards...I go online to the
Walmart Print Center and choose a card
(I make sure it says "Merry Christmas" and NOT "Happy Holidays"),
I then add the photo of my choice, place my order and
pick them up a few day's later. Pretty simple...
and they only cost .33 cents each.
After I pick up the cards, I type up a message to my family and friends
on my computer (which includes the gospel), print it out then
glue it on the back of the photo, like this... But this year I really haven't been in the mood.
Maybe it's because Emilio and I tried taking
a photo the other night and Baby wasn't behaving.
First, I tried to grab her but she's pretty heavy maybe over 40 lbs...

I tried to get a good grip on her leg but she doesn't
look very comfortable--wouldn't make for a good card...

She looks like she ready to make the escape on this one...poor thing. :-)

This wasn't going to make it on our Christmas cards for 08'...

On a serious note, I've sort of been debating sending cards at all this year. In a way I feel like the cards are a waste of time and money and besides...don't most people throw out their cards anyway? But then I remind myself that I look forward to receiving everyone elses cards each year...plus it gives me an opportunity to share the gospel again.

I typically like to have my Christmas Cards mailed out by now. So with all that said, I'm sort of behind on things. And I'd like to hear from you...

What do you normally do for cards?
Do you include a Gospel message? If so, what do you say?
Do you give out Christmas Cards?

Only in Southern California...

I wonder if I could get Baby Sue to do this?

The amazing Baby Sue...keeping her eye on the ball...

Maybe if I take her to the park this will draw a crowd ...
Baby's got serious hops!

So this is what my dog has been up to lately...

Baby has watched endless hours of Greg Bahnsen

lecturing on presuppositional apologetics...

Guess she'll be ready to hit the streets

with me real soon! :-)